谁说站在光里的才算英雄？在抗癌路上，他是一名“孤勇者”-免费源码丞旭猿

活到什么年纪，可以不再在意生死呢？

对于作词人唐恬来说，她的答案都写在了歌曲《孤勇者》之中。29岁确诊了鼻咽癌的她，经历了抗癌的艰辛，也更加懂得了勇敢的意义。

爱你孤身走暗巷，爱你不跪的模样…… 《孤勇者》中的滚烫歌词，鼓舞着每一个曾经身处暗巷的人，其中也包括六年前罹患骨癌的00后少年赵德煜。

穿越绝境之后，我依旧热爱生活

最近《孤勇者》这首歌特别火，我也很喜欢这首歌，但是我喜欢的原因，和其他人可能并不相同。

在21世纪杯的颁奖典礼上，来自西北师范大学的赵德煜发表了题为《穿越绝境，依旧热爱生活（Seeing the world as it is and loving it）》的演讲，讲述了自己与病痛抗争但仍热爱生活的故事。

△赵德煜在中国日报社21世纪杯颁奖典礼上的演讲

演讲稿全文：

Seeing the world as it is and loving it

Recently a song called Lonely Warrior has become very popular, especially among those in kindergarten or primary school. I love this song too. In fact, I have kind of become obsessed with it, but my reasons for liking it may be different from those of others.

Six years ago after hosting a school’s annual ceremony, I found my left leg was a little swollen, and very soon I could barely walk. In fact the swollen part became a fist-sized meat ball that was extremely painful, so much so that I could barely sleep. Of course I went to a local hospital, where I was given very bleak news. This growth was a malignant tumor called osteosarcoma, which means bone cancer.

Over the next two years I underwent chemotherapy, and it was the worst time of my life. Physically, I felt that the side effects of chemotherapy were killing me. I lost all my bodily hair and was totally bald. I could barely eat anything even if I felt hungry. I no longer needed an alarm clock to wake up in the morning. Instead what woke me was my body telling me I needed to vomit.

I had no idea where all this treatment would leave me, and the dreams I had once nursed about the future were entirely wiped out.

It was incredibly frustrating, and yet I felt there was no one I could talk to. In fact my parents were unaware that I knew I had cancer. I was deeply depressed until one afternoon before undergoing some surgery. My parents and I went to a beautiful park near the hospital, with me in a wheelchair.

The park was called Yuyuantan. It was spring and the weather was beautiful. There was a lake, and many people were on boats in the middle of it. Many old people were playing all types of instruments. I heard people laughing and babies crying. I heard birds singing and saw flowers blooming.

For me it seemed I was the only one suffering, overwhelmed by the pain of the world. Any emotion between people was entirely theirs to enjoy, as was happiness. I felt I had nothing and it seemed so unfair. I was young and should be looking forward to infinite possibilities. I did not want my life to end this way.

I wanted to feel the world and experience more, and I stuck to the course of treatment. However, as time went by, I became weaker and weaker, and the side effects were far worse than they had been earlier.

For financial reasons my parents had to go back to work, and for a long time I faced my time in hospital alone. Yet I acted like a warrior in fighting against all of this. So over the next two years I underwent 21 courses of chemotherapy and had three operations.

Eventually I was able to return to school and made many new friends. Much to my surprise I could finally walk normally, and my left leg looked perfectly normal. Better still, I was able to host another ceremony in this new high school.

But life sometimes has a way of mocking us. Walking down some stairs one day I fell, and on the way to see the doctor I was quite sure there could be only one outcome of this meeting: my left leg would have to be amputated. However, the doctor presented some treatment ideas that would allow me to keep the leg. The drawback was that such treatment was not only very risky but very expensive as well.

I said the leg could be chopped off, and the doctor said that might be the best thing to do, as long as I could cope with the psychological and social pressures. I made my decision very calmly, because I knew things could not be worse, and I was determined that this was just one more battle I would win.

Now, six years later, I have come through all these difficulties, and I am back to those days where yet again I have dreams to fulfill. I am studying something I love, the art of broadcasting and hosting. What’s more, I did a lot of public speaking in the 19th Asian Games English star competition recently. It was the first time I had told my stories in public, and one of the judges said how great it was to see me healed and telling stories confidently.

After six years fighting this battle I have come out on top. I have gained a lot of strength and many powers along the way, and I want to tell you a little about that.

I know the world can be a very tough place; it’s not all fairytales. I have been so lucky to be able to find the strength and fortitude to deal with all of this, and I can tell anyone still struggling against difficulties: have faith in yourself and do not let bad moments drag you down. Just hang on and you will come through.

To the beautiful young lady who failed to get into graduate school I say: there are so many others choices you can make that will give you a good life. Your journey has been tough, but you should not waste all that you have learned along the way.

To that handsome man who was suffering from a strange disease I say: the world is unfair, but don’t let that get you down. Let every minute count and you will find that pain you have endured is just a small part of your life. It is up to you to paint the blank parts of life’s canvas.

I would tell those dissatisfied with life: find the spark to light up the darkness, and soon it will be like savoring the smell of delicious food or like enjoying the smile on the faces of those you love. As you look forward to those things, change your life, and do so bravely.

And to those who have struggled and suffered, I say: even in the gutter, hope appears as we see others looking to the stars. Never lose hope.

And finally let me return to that obsession of mine, Lonely Warrior. The lyrics I really love in that are those that say a hero isn’t always someone who stands in the light.

Many bad things happen in life, but they do not mean we should give up. All the ways to fight tough battles were meant to be lonely.

You need to go through all this by yourself. Others may give you strength, but only you can win the battle. And when you do, a crack will appear in the room of darkness, and light will begin to pour in.

The French dramatist Romain Roland once put it so wisely: There is only one heroism in the world: to see the world as it is and to love it.

我曾仰望星空，也曾坠入深渊

六年前，16岁的赵德煜发现，自己的左腿有些发肿。很快，他就连路都走不了了，疼得无法入眠，而检查结果却更加令人绝望——骨癌。

接下来的两年里，我接受了化疗治疗，这是我人生最黑暗的两年。我感觉化疗的副作用，不断摧毁我的身体。早上我再也不需要闹钟，因为呕吐感会直接将我唤醒。

然而，这还只是疾病给身体带来的磨难，梦想的破灭、对人生的迷茫将赵德煜的生活拉入了深渊。

I had no idea where all this treatment would leave me and the dreams I had once nursed about the future were entirely wiped out. 经过这些治疗后我会变成怎样，我毫无概念，我曾经怀有的关于未来的梦想不复存在。

赵德煜的父母并不知道，其实他已经得知自己患癌的真相。由于家庭财务的压力，赵德煜的父母不得不回去工作，赵德煜只能独自在病房中与癌症抗争。

无人倾诉的孤独感，不可预见未来的无力感，正一步步侵蚀着这个少年的内心。

某一天的下午，父母推着他去了玉渊潭公园，那天春光明媚、天气正好，老人小孩，欢笑吵闹，一切都是那么地充满生机。

在那一瞬间，这个身处于玉渊潭公园的少年，似乎与曾经流连于地坛公园的史铁生，有了许多共鸣。

那位同样坐着轮椅的作家写道：苦难既然把我推到了悬崖边缘，那就让我在这悬崖的边缘坐下来，顺便看看悬崖下的流岚雾霭，唱着歌给你听。

而这位不服输的少年在心中默念：

I was young and should be looking forward to infinite possibilities, I did not want my life to end this way. 我还年轻，未来有无限的可能，我不希望我的生命就这样结束。

身在低谷，自渡是我的解药

强者不是没有眼泪，而是含着眼泪依然奔跑。对于赵德煜来说，他再一次遭受生活无情的对待，但是，总会有希望。

I wanted to feel the world and experience more, and I stuck to the course of treatment. 世界如此精彩，而我也要为自己追求感知世界、经历世界的权力，所以我选择坚持化疗。

化疗的副作用让赵德煜的身体变得越来越虚弱，然而心理的强大，往往能成为一个人最有力的武器。

在住院期间，赵德煜成为了一名真正的孤勇者，吃药、化疗、手术，他都一个人扛了下来。

Yet I acted like a warrior in fighting against all of this. So over the next two years I underwent 21 courses of chemotherapy and had three operations. 在住院期间，我像个勇士一样和这一切斗争，在接下来的两年，我接受了21个疗程的化疗，做了三次手术。

终于，赵德煜能够回到学校，也认识了新的朋友，甚至可以正常的行走！

他还在高中又一次主持了学校的年度典礼，似乎一切都在向正轨发展。

但是，命运却总和人开着不合时宜的玩笑，在有的时候，好不容易拾起的希望也会落空。

一天，赵德煜在下楼梯的时候摔了一跤，被送进了医院。原来，他左腿的情况，比想象的要严重。

在医生的建议之下，赵德煜冷静地在两个方案中做出了选择——同意截肢。

I made my decision very calmly, because I knew things could not be worse, and I was determined that this was just one more battle I would win. 因为我深知，情况再糟也不会超过现在了，下定决心只需要再赢下这场战斗而已。

六年后的今天，赵德煜熬过了一切痛苦，就读于西北师范大学，也回到了有梦想的日子。学习着他热爱的一切，广播、主持、艺术……

他也通过公共演讲，将自己的经历分享给每一位听众，为听众带来鼓舞和希望。

苦难不值得歌颂，但勇敢的我们值得

赵德煜的故事，被人铭记的从不只是苦难，更是他对生活的热爱，穿过黑夜，带来光亮。

在治愈的路上，赵德煜收获了很多的力量和勇气，他也希望将自己的故事告诉给大家。

I know the world can be a very tough place; it’s not all fairytales. I have been so lucky to be able to find the strength and fortitude to deal with all of this. 我深知世事艰难，现实也不尽如童话故事。我很幸运能够获得，应对这一切的力量和毅力。 And I can tell anyone still struggling against difficulties: have faith in yourself and do not let bad moments drag you down. Just hang on and you will come through. 我想告诉所有仍在与苦难斗争的人——相信自己，不要为痛苦所累，只要坚持下去，就会渡过难关。

赵德煜用他的亲身经历，鼓励着每一个人，为他们带来希望的微光。

他对那些为学业而倍感焦虑的人们，和病魔勇敢作斗争的人们，对生活的不满抱怨的人，仍在挣扎受苦的人们说：

Let every minute count and you will find that the pain you have endured is just a small part of your life. It is up to you to paint the blank parts of life’s canvas. 珍惜每一分钟，你会发现你所忍受的痛苦只是生命中的一小部分，人生画布上的空白由你自己来填补。 And to those who have struggled and suffered, I say: even in the gutter, hope appears as we see others looking to the stars. Never lose hope. 对于那些挣扎和受苦的人，我要说，即使身在底层，看到其他人仰望星空时，希望也会出现，永远不要丧失希望。

由于和《孤勇者》作词人有着相似的人生经历，赵德煜对歌词产生了深深的共鸣。他说，这是他最喜欢的歌。

谁说站在光里的才是英雄。黑暗中的人们，也在努力仰头看着星空。不管遇到什么挫折和磨难，始终乐观向上，竭尽全力活出自己。

Many bad things happen in life, but they do not mean we should give up. 生活中会发生很多糟糕的事情，但这并不意味着我们应该选择放弃。 All the ways to fight tough battles were meant to be lonely. 所有的硬仗，都注定是孤独的。 You need to go through all this by yourself. Others may give you strength, but only you can win this battle. And when you do, a crack will appear in the room of darkness, and light will begin to pour in. 这一切需要你自己一个人走过，可能会有别人给你力量，但只有你自己才能赢得这场战斗。当你成功时，漆黑的房间将出现一条裂缝，光明会开始涌入。

史铁生说：生命分为两种：一种叫作有限的身在，一种叫作无限的行魂。

这位00后少年，大概就是这无限的行魂，虽然经历化疗、左腿截肢，但灵魂始终坚韧、闪亮如初。

There is only one heroism in this world: to see the world as it is and to love it. 世界上只有一种真正的英雄主义，那就是看清世界真相之后，依旧热爱生活。

穿越绝境，依旧热爱生活，也许就是生命的价值所在。

这是赵德煜的人生写照，亦是赵德煜对每个身处低谷的人的期盼与鼓励。

总有一道光，穿过暗巷、透过绝望，照亮每一位和命运斗争的勇者，让你更多地爱这个世界。

每一个努力生活、对弈命运的人，都是自己的英雄！

视频：朱京京

编辑：吴迪

实习生：杨一琳 王胤斐

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